Two Way Traffic

Some of you might think that I will talk about the overrated traffic in The Philippines ( maybe on my next blog I will )

At the end of this blog, you will learn the importance of this phrasal adjective.

So as you know, my current job is to teach ESL online. 95% of my students are nice, 5% of them are either racist, sexist or judgemental. And I am here to talk about that 5%.

So there is this girl, a teacher, in her mid-50s who's been studying English for about 3 years. If I would describe her level of speaking skill, pardon my rudeness but she is still a beginner for me.

My job is to correct the thick accent of a student. But, that would still depend upon their request. Her reason for studying is to pass IELTS ( International English Language Testing System )

The International English Language Testing System (IELTS) measures the language proficiency of people who want to study or work where English is used as a language of communication.

The first time I met her, it was really irritating to listen to her. She never properly introduced herself and she demanded right away to do this and do that, which is okay because she is paying me to follow her preferences. But doing it in a very dominant way is a different story.

However, I did my best to stay calm and supported her needs in the lesson. I asked questions based on the lesson material and she kept skipping some exercises because she said she already read it a million times.

So I kept asking questions and I kept giving her feedback to some of the questions she answered. There are times that I would just listen and will not give her feedback at all because some of the pronunciations and her formula in grammar are correct. But she made me feel that I ain't doing my job because she will sometimes ask "Why are you not giving me feedback?" I answered, "Don't worry, I will give you corrections when it is essential."

To summarize, we finished the 25-minute session in a good way. ( I think haha )

I wasn't expecting her to book my class again because she made me feel that I was useless during our class. Surprisingly, she came back.

The third time I met her, she gradually introduced herself, that's where I learned that she is currently working as a teacher. Also, she mentioned that this will be her second time getting an IELTS exam and of course her goal is to past this time.

That's when I realized where the frustrations are coming from. Imagine, almost 3 years of studying and you failed your exam. That's why I tried to extend my hand and help her out. However, there is really something wrong with her. The main problem is her willingness to listen.

So every time that I proactively correct her mistakes she always says these things.

"My mouth has it's own life, it says words with "S" sound although it's unnecessary."

"Did I really say that? I can't remember. Anyway, let's continue."

"You should tell me if my answers are too long"

It is really devastating to communicate with her, but I can't do anything about it because she is my student.

A week ago, she had another session with me. This time, she said that she has a schedule of her IELTS exam in the next two days. I guided her with all my heart and God knows how much I put my time and effort to prepare her. But deep in my heart, I know she will not pass. But I was hoping that she will.

Earlier this afternoon, I had a session with her, I asked her about the exam and she said she failed. I felt bad for her, and I can feel that there is this point that she wanted to give up learning English. She said the only reason she attended a class today is because of her 1 year paid in advance agreement with the school. No one wants to put their money on a waste anyway.

I treat the session like a normal day with her. She abruptly said that "I think need to work on my listening skill"

I wanted to tell her that listening is not a skill. It is the backbone of communication. I wanted her to know that she will never be a great speaker if she doesn't know her audience. Communication is two-way traffic. It's not just about talking, it is also about listening.

All people should know how to properly drive a conversation. Just because we know how to drive, we will push at the maximum speed limit without thinking about what will happen next. Pacing is important in communication. If you are too slow, people will not enjoy the journey with you. If you are too fast, they will feel scared and ended up leaving you alone.

You will never be half of your trip unless you know how to read traffic signs. Learn when it's the right time to start the engine and know when to stop. There are times that we are too excited to have the yellow sign turn into green because we wanted to be ahead of other vehicles. Only to find out that we have to stop again on another traffic sign when it turns red.

You may wonder why I didn't tell her those things? It is because will issue is not being taught in class. It's more like self-realization. And she needed to find that out on her own.

No road is long with good company so let us teachers be your guide right beside the passenger seat. :)